The first Pilipinas Debates 2016 got everyone talking from start to finish and even up to now, the effect is still tremendous. Two days passed, the Presidential Candidates have already been receiving some of the most mind blowing comparisons–mostly are from the different types of people we encounter everyday. From a throwback scenario imagining each candidate as one of our old classmates to the different Hogwarts Houses of Harry potter, there is a new one nurses are yet to hear.

Winston Saddul takes credit to our very own roundup of the different nursing roles if each Presidential Candidate is in the hospital setting.

If Presidential Candidates were Nurses, Which Role would They Play?

Miriam, PhD MAN MAEd, MPH

Si Miriam ang nurse mong may PhD MAN MAEd, MPH, mas matalino pa sya sa Chief Nurse ninyo. Maski sa ibang doctor.

Miriam is the staff nurse who pursued almost all the masters of science in nursing, smarter than her chief nurse which leaves doctors not even an exemption.

Grace, USRN

Si Grace ang nurse mong USRN, nagpapa-assign na kaagad sa ICU kahit wala pang experience at kaka-hire palang.

Grace is the newly hired USRN holder, the know-it-all nurse who confidently begs to be assigned in ICU despite of having less to no experience at all.

Binay, “The Kleptomaniac Nurse”

Si Jojo ay yung nurse mong galing sa ibang ward sabi niya naging maayos daw ang ward na yun dahil sa kanya. Pag siya’y naka-duty nawawalan kayo ng supplies. Pag tinanong mo sya, hindi daw siya ang kumukuha nun, kahit na kayong dalawa lang ang nandun. Minsan nakita mo yung ballpen mo gamit nya, sabi mo “ballpen ko ba yan?”… Sabi nya “hindi akin to, minana ko pa eto”.

Binay who takes credit of everything from the things he didn’t do including those, he doesn’t own. He’s the nurse who floats to different departments and comes back proud of how things improved because of him. He’s also the culprit behind the missing supplies who endlessly denies it. Even your pen which he’s currently using it, he’ll definitely reason out that it’s his, “hindi akin to, minana ko pa eto”.

Duterte, “The Favorite Nurse”

Si Rody ang nurse mong mahal ang mga patiente, reliable sya pag may code, bagay sya sa ER. Pag sya nakaduty tuwang-tuwa mga in-patients, galit sa pasaway na bantay. Secured ka pag kasama mo siya, kaya pag-out ninyo galing sa night duty sasabihin mo sa kanya “sabay tayo” kasi alam mong may protection ka habang nasa daan kayo. Ipagtatanggol ka din sa mga doctor o kahit kanino man kung alam nyang tama ka.

Duterte is the favorite, the most loved by the patients, very reliable in emergency codes, perfect in the ER department. He’s the nurse favored by the patients despite by his anger against hard-headed watchers. As for his co-nurses, he’s the go-to-nurse in most situations from the doctors or to anyone even when going home after night duty.

Mar, “The One with Backer”

Si Mar, matagal ng nurse, malakas sa Chief Nurse at sa Admin.

Mar is the long time running nurse who is close to the superiors and the administration. In short, he’s the nurse you dread for having a backer.

Although the different nursing roles above may have been a bull’s eye in most parts, still these are just made for fun, hence, let’s not take things seriously. Therefore, let’s vote wisely, Nurses!